This was such a beautiful description of what it means to walk around with pieces of your heart in other places. I loved that line from Hamnet too, I'm sure I underlined it with stars and exclamation points in the margins. To be a mother is a special sort of gift that keeps giving. Love this essay. XO
Yes! The gift that keeps giving and stretching us. Such a privilege to be a parent but also so hard at times. Haha! Yes that line - I think of it often. Thanks for your encouragement. 🤗
Sue, I'm simply sitting with all you've written. Absorbing all the truth and grace you've shared. I feel honored to be in your company this afternoon ...
Catching up on what you've shared here. This is incredibly beautiful and touching. My oldest is soon 14. I will wrestle with the things I cannot control. Thankfully, God's close to us in all seasons. You are loved Sue! I do hope we can connect in real time...
Thank you for reading - ohh there are so many letting-gos that we need to do as moms 💔. May you find the grace and wisdom you need in every moment. I will do everything I can to make sure we have time to meet up soon.
Beyond beautiful Sue. Just extraordinarily beautiful. This resonates deeply, as you know, and I’m so grateful and will come back to the way you capture so much here. The elastic. The plants that don’t move. The tearing. But also the hope and the beauty. And faith. The way you write about the seeming mismatch of the seasons reminds me of the way that Stephanie Duncan Smith writes about the liturgical year and our life experiences not always “corrrsponding”, so to speak. All of this. ❤️❤️❤️❤️
I thought this might resonate with you and maybe it helps just a little as you prepare for the leaving that is headed your way. You are not alone my friend. ❤️❤️❤️
I'm a new subscriber, and I completely loved and resonated with this post, as I am a little beyond a midlife mom. Tears welled up as you so beautifully and perfectly described my own experiences with grown children and their own kids who all far away - one a 6-hour drive and the other two requiring flights. I also "constantly cast out my thoughts like fishing lines," often literally in the form of texts, which thankfully are always answered - sooner or later. Thank you so much for this.
Thank you for subscribing and for your comments. It is so good to know we are not alone in the ache we moms carry. And I am so grateful for the technology we have at our disposal. We just had a FaceTime family conversation last night and that helps to fill in the gaps. With you in this mothering journey. I understand it’s even harder to be away from grandchildren 😢I’m sorry.
Yes, it is hard saying goodbye but so necessary, there is a sense of their desiring to do this without us, so we must let them. But yes when they suffer we just want to take them under our wings again. My daughter is blessed to have a very committed partner. Knowing he is older than her 24 years and levelheaded and mature means I can relax. Even when they argue and she comes to me for wisdom I can point her to the 'true husband of her heart', the God who loves her intimately, so she knows not to put all her eggs in one basket xxx
Yes knowing they have someone who loves and supports them is so helpful and like you say helps us relax. And knowing they are always surrounded by the care and presence of God 🙌
I fail at this all the time--the desire to control the future--but I wonder if this is somehow more intense for mothers. Whatever the case, this Capacity for Wings installment was beautifully engrossing. May your greeny kingdom thrive.
Steve, I can only imagine how you have also been deeply affected by watching helplessly as your loved one suffers and you have been changed by it. I don’t know that it is any more intense for mothers but thank you for seeing the struggle. And thank you for your encouraging words 💕
Thank you Sue, I so relate to this. I am slowly becoming accustomed to my daughter living a plane's ride away. One of her last comments to me, "we need to see each other more often, twice a year doesn't feel quite right". No it doesn't, but how true that as mothers we send out fishing lines on the airwaves each day. Its been a comfort to know I can leave with God what I can't influence or make better. Its a comfort to know that we have God between us, comforting our loved ones as we are comforted.
I am sorry you are doing this long-distance mothering too - it is sure hard in the heart! 💔 it seems as soon as I give them over into God’s care I am already trying to take them back 😜 so it has become something I need to do often. Do you find it especially hard after being with them and being part of their lives then going home? That is the hardest for me. Also knowing one of mine is suffering 😢.
"...I feel betrayed by nature"--love that whole exploration. I really appreciate th unfolding meaning of this piece. It ends in a very different place from where it began.
Thank you for this. I heard something long ago to the effect that becoming a mother means we will forever more wear our hearts on our sleeves, exposed. It is a comfort knowing God loves our children more than we do but, for me at least, I can’t help but bear their burdens.
Yes I think that is true, our hearts are exposed. Oh I hear you! We know God is loving them better than we can but the natural desire of us mothers is to bear the weight for them. Peace to you in this journey.
Grief is the shadow of love, beautifully expressed. I am in a catamaran in the Indian Ocean with my partner, waves splashing into the cabin, trying to hide my tears from him as I read this. I don't want him to worry about me. I think of my adult daughters in distant Adelaide every day but I'm glad that they're independent and that technology permits me to chat to them every day even from the Indian Ocean.
Thank you Prasanta for reading. This is a particular ache we share 😢. You are not alone. With you in the continual struggle to keep letting them go over and over again
This was such a beautiful description of what it means to walk around with pieces of your heart in other places. I loved that line from Hamnet too, I'm sure I underlined it with stars and exclamation points in the margins. To be a mother is a special sort of gift that keeps giving. Love this essay. XO
Yes! The gift that keeps giving and stretching us. Such a privilege to be a parent but also so hard at times. Haha! Yes that line - I think of it often. Thanks for your encouragement. 🤗
Sue, I'm simply sitting with all you've written. Absorbing all the truth and grace you've shared. I feel honored to be in your company this afternoon ...
Linda thank you for being with me and bearing witness to the midlife mom struggle
Catching up on what you've shared here. This is incredibly beautiful and touching. My oldest is soon 14. I will wrestle with the things I cannot control. Thankfully, God's close to us in all seasons. You are loved Sue! I do hope we can connect in real time...
Thank you for reading - ohh there are so many letting-gos that we need to do as moms 💔. May you find the grace and wisdom you need in every moment. I will do everything I can to make sure we have time to meet up soon.
Beyond beautiful Sue. Just extraordinarily beautiful. This resonates deeply, as you know, and I’m so grateful and will come back to the way you capture so much here. The elastic. The plants that don’t move. The tearing. But also the hope and the beauty. And faith. The way you write about the seeming mismatch of the seasons reminds me of the way that Stephanie Duncan Smith writes about the liturgical year and our life experiences not always “corrrsponding”, so to speak. All of this. ❤️❤️❤️❤️
I thought this might resonate with you and maybe it helps just a little as you prepare for the leaving that is headed your way. You are not alone my friend. ❤️❤️❤️
❤️🙏🥰
I'm a new subscriber, and I completely loved and resonated with this post, as I am a little beyond a midlife mom. Tears welled up as you so beautifully and perfectly described my own experiences with grown children and their own kids who all far away - one a 6-hour drive and the other two requiring flights. I also "constantly cast out my thoughts like fishing lines," often literally in the form of texts, which thankfully are always answered - sooner or later. Thank you so much for this.
Thank you for subscribing and for your comments. It is so good to know we are not alone in the ache we moms carry. And I am so grateful for the technology we have at our disposal. We just had a FaceTime family conversation last night and that helps to fill in the gaps. With you in this mothering journey. I understand it’s even harder to be away from grandchildren 😢I’m sorry.
Yes, it is hard saying goodbye but so necessary, there is a sense of their desiring to do this without us, so we must let them. But yes when they suffer we just want to take them under our wings again. My daughter is blessed to have a very committed partner. Knowing he is older than her 24 years and levelheaded and mature means I can relax. Even when they argue and she comes to me for wisdom I can point her to the 'true husband of her heart', the God who loves her intimately, so she knows not to put all her eggs in one basket xxx
Yes knowing they have someone who loves and supports them is so helpful and like you say helps us relax. And knowing they are always surrounded by the care and presence of God 🙌
I fail at this all the time--the desire to control the future--but I wonder if this is somehow more intense for mothers. Whatever the case, this Capacity for Wings installment was beautifully engrossing. May your greeny kingdom thrive.
Steve, I can only imagine how you have also been deeply affected by watching helplessly as your loved one suffers and you have been changed by it. I don’t know that it is any more intense for mothers but thank you for seeing the struggle. And thank you for your encouraging words 💕
This is beautiful. Thank you.
Thank you for all the encouragement to revise 💕
Thank you Sue, I so relate to this. I am slowly becoming accustomed to my daughter living a plane's ride away. One of her last comments to me, "we need to see each other more often, twice a year doesn't feel quite right". No it doesn't, but how true that as mothers we send out fishing lines on the airwaves each day. Its been a comfort to know I can leave with God what I can't influence or make better. Its a comfort to know that we have God between us, comforting our loved ones as we are comforted.
I am sorry you are doing this long-distance mothering too - it is sure hard in the heart! 💔 it seems as soon as I give them over into God’s care I am already trying to take them back 😜 so it has become something I need to do often. Do you find it especially hard after being with them and being part of their lives then going home? That is the hardest for me. Also knowing one of mine is suffering 😢.
"...I feel betrayed by nature"--love that whole exploration. I really appreciate th unfolding meaning of this piece. It ends in a very different place from where it began.
Thank you so much - I appreciate your observations on this piece. I never know where they will end up!
Thank you for this. I heard something long ago to the effect that becoming a mother means we will forever more wear our hearts on our sleeves, exposed. It is a comfort knowing God loves our children more than we do but, for me at least, I can’t help but bear their burdens.
Yes I think that is true, our hearts are exposed. Oh I hear you! We know God is loving them better than we can but the natural desire of us mothers is to bear the weight for them. Peace to you in this journey.
Thank you! On this Mothering Sunday your words resonated so deeply. The stretch marks on my soul felt your longing love for your dear ones
Bearing witness to a part of your mothering journey through these words is a privilege. We are in this together. Thanks for your comment.
Once again- beautiful!
Thank you 😊 💕
Grief is the shadow of love, beautifully expressed. I am in a catamaran in the Indian Ocean with my partner, waves splashing into the cabin, trying to hide my tears from him as I read this. I don't want him to worry about me. I think of my adult daughters in distant Adelaide every day but I'm glad that they're independent and that technology permits me to chat to them every day even from the Indian Ocean.
💔 holding the joy and the grief at the same time - I hear you. Comfort to your mama heart 🙏
This is beautiful. I resonate so much with this ache of having grown children who live far away. Thank you.
Thank you Prasanta for reading. This is a particular ache we share 😢. You are not alone. With you in the continual struggle to keep letting them go over and over again